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Loosing a friend.


I am human, just like you, the reader. We make mistakes which impact our friendships. Unluckily enough for me I only have three friends… well one, I guess. I can’t really count my boyfriend and today one of my friends has decided to end our friendship of 10 years. Now she has her reasons, but I also have my reasons as to proceed with the friendship.

A little bit about me and my relationship.

I would like to say since the day we met, I have been the same person. I am quite laid back and I like to stay out of drama. We joined the same secondary school after that and still, we were friends. Now in secondary school I would do anything to become unnoticed. I would sit in the library at lunch with my old friends (not including her) where we would just talk. All of us wanted the same thing. To be invisible. Now, I am a military girlfriend, which coincidently means I see my boyfriend every couple of months. Due to this, I often get myself in a state where I get unhappy and I miss him, obviously. I relied on her to make me happy. However, these past couple of weeks I could not have felt anything more than wanting to be away from her. In a way her boyfriend and her kept making comments about my relationship and how it was stupid to get myself in a long distant relationship. On top of that she kept saying how she believed, and I quote “Every man in the military cheats. I don’t believe that they can be loyal.”

For this next scenario I will allocate them with fake names just to keep privacy.

She will be called Sarah.

Her boyfriend will be called Tom.

My boyfriend will remain with his name, Bailey.

So, the story I am proceeding to tell you is the first, and only time Sarah and Tom met my boyfriend. So, Sarah invited bailey and I to her house where Tom and herself were chilling. We came to her house and I introduced them to bailey. Now Tom talked a lot about himself. He always made himself out to be this guy from a rough background who knows every trick in the book. Tom, being the guy he is, stood close to my boyfriend, stood on his tip toes a little, due to my boyfriend being taller and stared into his eyes.

“He’s not that muscly, I think I can beat him in a fight,” Tom spoke.

Lets just keep in mind Tom Is all talk. Now, I believe body shaming is wrong, even if you’re not friends with them, so let’s just say that Tom was half of what my boyfriend was. We also need to put in perspective that my boyfriend is in the army. He trains to fight. He trains to kill. Tom just said that to a trained killer. Luckily enough, I squeezed my boyfriends’ hand, which he knew meant that I don’t want him to say anything which will stir an argument.

While we were at her house, they both seemed a little odd towards me. They were blunt and may I say, quite rude. In perspective, if I had spoken to my friends in that way in front of my parents, I would have a hand print on my skin. Not only this, but they mocked Bailey for his job. Saying things such as:

. “But aren’t you just a cadet?”

. “why would you join one of the hardest jobs in the army when you have a girlfriend at home?”

. “what about if you die in battle?”

These sickened me to the core. My boyfriend is risking his life to serve his country… and people like this.

However, I accepted that this situation happened, and I forgave her. I just vowed that I would never allow Bailey to ever be around them again. It was not fair on him and honestly, it scared him a little.

Another scenario that happened was when my boyfriend was back on base (in the army). So, I hadn’t seen my boyfriend for about a year, he then came back for a week… A WEEK! We spent every second together. However, he had gone home, and I now had 4 months until I next saw him so obviously, I was upset. So where did I go? To Sarah and Tom.  

I had turned the corner and they were there. I said hello, to which they replied. I didn’t even have a second to speak before Tom squeezed in, “Oh your depressed again.” He sighed straight after. He then asked why. I didn’t say anything because I knew I was upset, but I wasn’t depressed. I told him that Bailey had gone back. He asked where. Where Sarah then jumped in with her not so funny joke.

“Afghanistan!” she laughed.

She had the audacity to say that!

See therefore, I had drifted from them two these past few weeks. In all honesty, I wasn’t so sad about bailey. I was sad that it had got to the point where I felt I was losing my friends.

A little about her and her relationship.

Sarah was quiet, just like me in primary school. However, she really found herself in secondary school. She was popular and she loved makeup and anything girly. Her grades weren’t the greatest, but they could have been if she put in some effort. She had fallen in and out of relationships a bit during secondary school, which is completely fine. You do you. She then met Tom and now they are nearly a year strong! We didn’t seem to see each other as much during this time which is honestly fine. She had other friends, she had a boyfriend.

However, she argued with her boyfriend A LOT! I know that is quite common for a couple but honestly it would be over reasons I believed to be quite silly. Once, she even admitted sometimes she started arguments with her boyfriend because she was bored.

Through every argument they had they would come to me to help them. I didn’t treat Sarah any differently to Tom due to her being one of my good friends. I told them both straight what I believed they needed to improve on, within reason obviously. This was drama and I hated it. However, she was my friend, so I wanted to help. I was always there.

I was there through the nights she cried because they broke up (they’re kind of on and off).

I was there when she took her ring off and decided it was the end (which it wasn’t. it was a false alarm and I knew it because it had happened plenty times before).

I was there when she wasn’t answering Tom’s phone calls after each argument and Tom wanted to know if she was okay.

I was there when she wanted help to prove to Tom’s parents that she wasn’t controlling or toxic to Tom when they clearly thought she was.

I was there when big scenarios happened too. Obviously, I am not going to share them due to them having privacy.

The problem I am having is deciding if this is my fault and whether it is better to try and talk to her or not.  Am I bad friend? Maybe I shouldn’t have given her relationship advice due to it not being my relationship?

Please help,

Arabella Seren.

xxx

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YOUR LOCAL FASHION FREAK NEEDS YOU!

Good morning readers,

So, I am having a dilemma! Who else here overthinks about events that are miles away? I know I am guilty of this. If I am honest, I am losing sleep over this silly scenario. To give you some context, in August I have an event to attend. Yes, I know August is six months away, but I overthink a lot. My boyfriend finishes his army training in August, which leads to a parade. Now, I have been to two parades before, due to my brother being in the air force, but this one is extra special. Traveling for 7 hours better be worth it!

Now I am stressing out for many reasons, even ones that aren’t even a big deal. Here are a few:

  • I want to look the best for my boyfriend after not seeing him for 4 months.
  • This will be a great photo opportunity due to my boyfriend being in his number 2 uniform. For anyone that is not familiar with this talk, it his smart uniform.
  • This is the first time I will meet all my boyfriends’ friends. Truthy, I wouldn’t call them friends. They have been through tough times and they are with each other every day… the bond will not break between them. They’re family. I want to make a good first impression.
  • I want to feel confident. Truth is I am not confident at all. I want to feel as confident as I can there because I don’t want my boyfriend to worry about me. If I am confident it also means I will do the things I want to. I know that if I feel confident, I won’t mind running to my boyfriend at the front of the crowd. I know if I did this people will look at me. So, if I wasn’t to feel confident, I wouldn’t do what my heart wants me to do.

So, I had made a checklist of things I want to change. I added aspects like, get my eyebrows threaded, workout often, eat healthy and drink loads of water, get my hair dyed and get my nails done.

However, the hardest bit is deciding makeup, hair and finally and outfit. I will place a few images below of ideas I was thinking about.

YOUR LOCAL FASHION FREAK NEEDS YOU! And your thoughts and ideas.

I imagine wearing a casual outfit such as the one above. The problem is, I want to have a look of simplicity, yet I want to turn heads to anyone who catches a glimpse at me. With black skinny jeans and a simple shirt, such as the photos above it is casual. However, the accessories and Gucci belt grabs the attention. If you were to wear this, where would you wear it?

Ah the makeup! I am not great at makeup. However, after watching a few of Nikkitutorials videos, I genuinely understood what to do! If you’re not sure of anything makeup wise, go to Nikki! I wanted to go for a simple makeup look. I don’t want to look like a greasy ball at the end of the event! Not only that but I also suck at doing any makeup other than natural. Tell me guys what you think!

Hairstyles. See hairstyles are tricky. I desired my hair down due to me getting it dyed for this event. However, now I think of it, I will probably have to redo it more times than I blink! So, I was thinking of curling my hair and doing an updo. This way, it is out of my face (and not annoying my neck!) and it will always look good if I put enough clips in!

If you were to wear this outfit with the hair and makeup I described, would you wear it to a parade?

Let me know.

Arabella Seren

xxx

Hello, I am Arabella Seren.

I am sorry you stumbled on this blog!

Welcome! My name is Arabella Seren and so far, I haven’t had a chance to explain what a messy young adult is doing on this blog website. I wanted to explain who I was before I had written anything on this blog. So here we go…

My name is Arabella Seren. I am a young adult. If I were in a social situation now, this is probably where they would ask for a fun fact about myself. In all honesty, I would rather get hit by a car than say an interesting fact about myself. But just for you guys, I have spent about 3 days trying to think of a fun fact about myself. Truth is, I realized I am not that fun. My fun fact is: Being a military girlfriend.

My boyfriend, Bailey, is in the British Army. For those guys who want to know what he does, he is a paratrooper. One of the hardest jobs in the British army. Now I am not going to guilt trip you guys in feeling sorry for me, but it can be hard for me at times too. About two months ago, my boyfriend came home due to him being half way through his training.  After not seeing him for a year, I saw him for a week straight. I think I speak for any military wife, girlfriend, husband, boyfriend and children when I say even a week is good news. On top of this are calls are short, facetime means his friends join in too, so it’s hardly ever just us two and there are always inconveniences. For example, this valentine’s day my boyfriend promised me a skype date. He told me that when he finished work, he was going to make the day the best day I have had so far, even if he wasn’t with me. Now he usually finishes work around half nine. So, I had a shower, did my hair and makeup and put on a ‘date outfit.’ I wanted to look special for my man. I have yet to come across a military girlfriend who doesn’t dress up for a skype call. However, I waited until half eleven. I was falling asleep in all honesty.

Then I got it. Not a skype call but a phone call. It was my boyfriend, Bailey. He explained how they made everyone in his group (platoon for my military girlfriends out there!) watch a boxing match. Now, I was so upset with what had happened. But do you know the hardest part? Bailey was so apologetic, but it wasn’t his fault. I couldn’t be mad at him. So yeah… that’s my interesting fact.

Now that I have explained my not so good interesting fact, lets get back to the blog.

My aims for this blog are to make friends. When I imagine this blog, I can imagine publishing work with a couple of readers who are regular and know when I post. Now, I want us to help each other and give each other advice about fashion and what would originally be called girly things. Now, I am not boycotting it to only women. MEN JOIN AS WELL! Anyone is welcome here, we are here to support each other.

So, what do you say? Are you in?

Arabella Seren

xxx ffffff